EVERYTHING YOU WANTED TO KNOW… BUT WISH YOU HADN’T ASKED 56

marrowI am a sparrow lover. I wish to know what organization I can contact. Please tender the details.
–Sayak Ghosh, Kamarhatty

Who doesn’t love a tender sparrow? Contact a speciality restaurant. The House Sparrows found in your neighbourhood are the most cosmopolitan of wild birds. Throughout history they have followed humans, and spread around the world. As a sign of our appreciation, we are now killing them. Their population is declining rapidly due to factors like pollution and lack of nesting space. In some places they are considered an endangered species. There’s an organization called the Environs Safe Organization studying their decline in your locality as also Kalyani and Baranagar, trying to develop a rescue plan. ESO carries out various sparrow-watching and artificial nesting activities (though they obviously can’t lay the eggs themselves). Their contacts are at 9874153431 or eso.organization@gmail.com.

This is Ayan Ghatak here, presently reading in class 11. I love astrophysics and want to make a career in it. Please give me some career guidelines and some related books to study. Please provide me with accurate details as far as possible.
–Ayan Ghatak, Madhyamgram

Tony Stark… I mean Ayan, man, did you think I’d give you inaccurate details? For the moment, and even at the undergraduate (B.Sc./B.E./B.Tech.) level, what you need to do is concentrate on physics and mathematics. Generally it’s only at the postgraduate level (when starting your M.Sc./M.Tech./integrated Ph.D.) that you’d begin astronomy courses. Your career options would include being a research scientist, a university professor, a technologist; or entering industry as in astronomical instruments, or programming and data-related jobs. For books and journals, search the web or try online libraries such as of the Indian Institute of Science; although you need not ‘study’ them at this stage.

I need your urgent help. I am a middle-aged technical consultant from South India. I migrated from Maharashtra in search of a job in the sixties and finally settled well in Coimbatore. I have a vast circle of friends in and around India. Many also get in touch with me from Mumbai, Kolkata, Jaisalmer and even from USA, UK. However, I am finding it difficult to answer their continuous flow of e-mails. I wish to take a lonely long long holiday and then resume when I feel fresh. Hence, I wish to remove my notification from Gmail, so that they would not get hurt. Please advise me how to do it.
–Anonymous, Coimbatore

Sometimes the best solution is to get rid of your friends. But to remove Gmail Notifier, if Windows is your operating system, go to ‘Control Panel’, then ‘Add or Remove Programs’, ‘Google Gmail Notifier’ and finally ‘Change/Remove’. If you’re using Mac, drag the ‘Google Notifier’ icon from the ‘Applications’ folder to ‘Trash’. However, your friends might think you were just ignoring their mails, and feel more hurt; or in the worst case arrive in a violent mob and hurt YOU seriously. Rather, consider setting an automatic vacation response to incoming mail. Sign in to your account, go to ‘Settings’, and under ‘General’ select ‘Vacation responder on’, enter a message, then click ‘Save Changes’. I recommend something honest such as ‘This is an automated response. I’m exhausted from answering emails and am taking a holiday, whereafter I shall reply posthaste’ or even ‘With friends like you, who needs torturers?’

Questions may be sent to burythequestion@gmail.com

2 Responses to “EVERYTHING YOU WANTED TO KNOW… BUT WISH YOU HADN’T ASKED 56”

  1. Komodocom says:

    Is that you in the graduation speech?

  2. roughgang says:

    It WAS myself (a number of years ago).

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